1. |
Goddamnit
02:10
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the sun burns down on this awful day
burning your eyes, you avert them
to find someone else to go to
when you fall apart, don't count on me
and watching from windows three stories above
to find the one that seems your equal
and fall in their arms as you fall apart
don't count on me
from windows to walls in this apartment
nothing matters when you can't feel a thing
cruel and unusual punishment
tired of sitting here
tired of waiting for you
from windows to walls in this apartment
nothing matters when you can't feel a thing
cruel and unusual punishment
tired of sitting here
tired of
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2. |
Anywhere but Here
03:42
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well it's 4 am and i'm wide awake
with so much in my head, it's all too much to take
and it's hard to say why i feel this way
but i did today and i will tomorrow
i never know what sets it off
or why it comes, or why i fall
tomorrow, tonight, and the night after
tomorrow, tonight, and back again
a fighting chance at second best
to prove myself above the rest
will i face this all, or stand up tall
or fall apart again
i'm really trying to get better this year
it's making things feel so insincere
cause i'd rather be anywhere else today
i'd rather be anywhere but here
nightmares and cold sweats, they happen to much
i'll try to shake it off as i feel disgust
and i'll hesitate to call or text
but i won't think twice to second guess
what do i want? do i even know
i can't seem to figure out if this is just for show
cause i don't doubt that i'll figure it out
but as to when it'll happen is anyone's guess and
a fighting chance at second best
to prove myself above the rest
will i face this all, or stand up tall
or fall apart again
i'm really trying to get better this year
it's making things feel so insincere
cause i'd rather be anywhere else today
i'd rather be anywhere but here
anywhere but here
a fighting chance at second best
to prove myself above the rest
will i face this all, or stand up tall
or fall apart again
i'm really trying to get better this year
it's making things feel so insincere
cause i'd rather be anywhere else today
i'd rather be anywhere but here
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3. |
Not Me
01:46
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throw a party, invite all your best friends
do what we want cause we're young and we're reckless
don't think about the time you're wasting
and disregard those dreams you're chasing
you fall apart when the night is over
remembering when you were sober
lay on the floor questioning your choices
try to avoid those small strange voices
it's not me, it's you
what the hell do i do
what the hell can i say to make it better
it's not me, it's you
what the fuck do i do
what the hell can i say to make it better
i'm lost and i'm calling out for you
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4. |
Dance With Me
02:46
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i'm wearing my heart in plain view
to open up your eyes
cause i really love you, i hope you love me too (signed, sealed, and delivered)
i'll leave this message on your phone
i don't wanna spend tonight alone
i need you more than you'll ever know (SOS to my heart)
cause you drive away the pain in my chest
i'm feeling young and reckless
so say you are too
and maybe i'm still not all there
but i swear to you, i'll swear and swear
that i'm yours forever, will you be mine?
so tonight i'm alone and waiting for your call
won't you please dance with me tonight
you don't know what you do to my heart
where the hell do i even start
my love, just dance with me
i'm laying next to you and
i feel my heart is racing
this must be what heaven feels like (heaven on earth)
your hand sits in mine
feels so different all this time
and i don't ever want to go back
we're the ones against their odds
no time to wait, let's do it all
falling in love all again
so tonight i'm alone and waiting for your call
won't you please dance with me tonight
you don't know what you do to my heart
where the hell do i even start
my love, just dance with me
we'll go down in a burning blaze glory
and we'll show them who's boss tonight
you're the one, i know
and i'm the one for you (stay with me tonight)
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5. |
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god damn i fell off again
why can't i just make things work
can barely fucking talk to anyone
i feel like such a jerk
will you even wanna pick up when your phone rings with my name
i won't lie again, but that's a lie
let's just say "i'm okay"
there's not much i can do, but i do the things i can
tired of running back and forth to the end of this damn land
tired of shutting myself in my room, but i'm fine here all the same
wish i could make it better, but i'm content living this way
i'm not the me i wanted
and i won't ever be
i can't find meaning in my own fucking words
my own fucking words
there's not much i can do, but i do the things i can
tired of running back and forth to the end of this damn land
tired of shutting myself in my room, but i'm fine here all the same
wish i could make it better, but i'm content living this way
i'm not the me i wanted
and i won't ever be
i can't find meaning in my own fucking words
my own fucking words
try my best to make new friends
but i fail just like every single time before
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6. |
Drugs
02:58
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like a dead man walking
no life behind your bright blue eyes
where the hell are you going
are you leaving me behind
you were my best friend, truly
since we weren't even a year old
you're like a slowboat sinking
i just stand back and watch you go
it's all in your head, yeah, it's all in your head
the chemicals, they're running wild
the nights where you said you wish you were dead
i can't wait to see you smile
you're on the road to recovery
but you slipped up and fell back in
you say you'll never go back there
for like the third damn time this week
who knows if i can trust you
hell, i can barely trust myself
i guess this must be goodbye
such a shame to see you go
it's all in your head, yeah, it's all in your head
the chemicals, they're running wild
the nights where you said you wish you were dead
i can't wait to see you smile
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7. |
I Hope You're Happy
02:36
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this day's going too slow to fit my pace
i'm not one for rainy days
i know you see through this defective smile
but i want you to know, and i want you to stay
maybe i'm not who you want me to be
but i'm fine this way, i'll be okay
maybe i'll be someone someday
but for now i hope you're happy with me
i woke up at 1 in the afternoon
to a text from you and a headache too
you asked what's wrong, i told you "nothing"
you knew i lied, "please tell me something"
i don't want to bring you down, and
maybe i'm not who you want me to be
but i'm fine this way, i'll be okay
maybe i'll be someone someday
but for now i hope you're happy with me
and all the stars at night
they shine into your eyes
you're everything i need
please just stay here with me
yeah!
maybe i'm not who you want me to be
but i'm fine this way, i'll be okay
maybe i'll be someone someday
but for now i hope you're happy with me
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8. |
Never Enough
01:44
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was there something i said to make you feel like that
if so, i take it back
i'm sorry
see, i get this way when i start to think too much
and i hate when i think too much
can't help it
can't help but feel like i messed this up
i'm tired of feeling like i'm never enough for you
or you
it's not your fault, yeah, it's all in my head
the nights where i feel like i'd be better off dead
i'm not
please take me with you, i'm ready if you are, my love
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9. |
Yesteryear
04:22
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a close up shot on your face through the window of the plane
watching your eyes turn to stay
coldest days and colder nights
was it worth it anyway
forget what i told you
tonight i'm gone
and watching through a window (watching through the window)
you watched me disappear (disappear)
you keep on asking where i ran off to (where'd you go)
i was never really here
i'll see you when i get back (see you when i get back)
i'll see you disappear (i'll watch you disappear)
i'm sorry for what i said
but that was yesteryear
yeah that was yesteryear
and i know (welcome back to the lie you like to call your life again)
i'm not the way you want me
and i know (welcome back to the lie you like to call your life)
i'm not the way that everyone expects me
it's all in my head (your life, it met my hands)
it's all in my head again (i never, i never ever)
what can i say to fix this mess
what is there i can fucking do
it's nothing, oh, it's just nothing
i'm sorry
i feel so lost
can you find me (can you find him)
do you see him in me
in me
in me in this dark dream
find me one of the reasons
buy me the changing seasons
define me
come find me
searching for a reason
in places i can't reach
i never meant to get this bad
no, i never meant to get this bad
i'm not the one (do you see me)
i'm not the one you're looking (do you see me)
i'm not the one you're wanting
i'm not worth it anymore
and i just don't know where i'm going from here
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Jordan Rupp Colorado Springs, Colorado
21 / in too many bands to list
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